Relaxing and Dissipating Personal Energies for New Creation


Spring 2015 & Canada L to L 217

This morning as I connected with my creative zone as meditation was evolving into my day, I once again felt the sting of some energy I’d been feeling for about a week, energy that was being expressed in troubled dreams.

I realized it was much more energy than stories from memories that I wasn’t dealing with well. I enjoy life much more and wondered why these energies of disturbance from past experiences were now being felt disturbingly. Hadn’t I been through the stories every which way? Hadn’t I done bio-energetics, tapping techniques, energy healing work, breath work, acupuncture, and massages to be free of aspects of what I’ve held on to?

I remembered several times in the past couple of weeks when I’ve thought about forgiveness. I pondered how I wanted to and could forgive people who have displayed chronic offenses I felt the need to withdraw from (fight, FLIGHT, or freeze) and couldn’t trust because of experiencing them repeating patterns. After all, I also repeat patterns and have worked diligently to eliminate wheels of repetition from me … yet not with total success yet. I thought about how I was forgiving but hit a snag. I know what it is like to repeat patterns even with a great deal of inner work. How could I trust someone not trying to be conscious like I’ve been working to be?

The snag was expectation that if I forgive I have to engage with the people again, setting myself up to go another round with them, and put myself at risk; risk something within me is protecting from. I realized the defense against the risk was to keep the stories and emotions alive as a reminder lest the part of me that is so willing to do a re-set and continue with people, once again trust where it wasn’t safe to trust.

Could forgiveness not be a program with expectations imposed by others and be fully and completely to set myself free of the very stories and very much alive energies that are holding me in patterns? Could it be about my relationship with them, yet not for them, I am forgiving?

The thoughts ripened without action for days.

This morning action from inaction happened. I wasn’t forcing anything to happen, just being with the thoughts and realizations of thinking and acting as a different me. Then, this simple process just released like the moment a tree releases a piece of its fruit that has arrived at the moment of readiness to drop to the ground.

The inception of an idea followed by intention for it to be was naturally there. It appeared as if out of the void of all possibilities for new creation, at least new for me.

I thought how I’ve connected with the energy of even a tsunami, and led it to relax and dissipate its energy. There were other natural events or events of mass consciousness I’d done the same with. I can, so I do. But somehow I have held a different belief about interpersonal, or my own personal energies. I haven’t bridged between the energies of nature and large populations of people, and the energies right at home I’m personally engaging myself with.

The inception was simple. Connect with the energies I’ve been harboring, then intend they relax; dissipate; and become available for new creation. I next noticed the energies as new energy available for new creation as part of the void, the abyss, the darkness, from which all creation is manifest. It was simply there eager and available for anything without any imprints or signatures of any kind for what form the energy had been taking (for me) for awhile. It was without any form. It wouldn’t be carrying anything of the past forward.

Then I did a personal internal inventory and noticed the energies troubling me were no longer there. I am free.

PRO-INCLUSION POLICY: We encourage LOVE in whatever form is most comfortable and expressive of each individual soul. In alignment with our vision of an accepting and loving planet, we do our best to hold a safe space for everyone, regardless of people’s age, abilities, gender, gender identity, race, religion or belief, or sexual orientation.